Division as the Root of Conflict

Used with permission from Flickr Creative Commons, and Photopin.com: http://www.flickr.com/photos/dragonfly1965/5948700943/ (c) dragonflynan1965 2011

This has been a rough week of terrorism for the U.S.A., in a single week we have witnessed the bombing of the Boston Marathon, and the mailing of ricin laden letters to President Obama and Senator Roger Wicker of Mississippi. This week was also the 18th anniversary of the Oklahoma City Bombing (04/19/1995).

Those directly effected by the Boston bombing showed tremendous heroism by rushing to the aid of those injured immediately following the attack, and some runners even continued running to the nearest hospital to donate blood… after already running a marathon! The city of Boston as a whole, also seemed to show tremendous resolve and unity during the manhunt for the perpetrators.

However, almost immediately after the news broke about the bombings many people who were not directly effected by the acts seemed to be in a rush to pin the blame on someone. Were the acts done by radical Muslims? Right-wing fundamentalists? North Koreans? Everyone seemed to be in a rush to pin blame on “them”. There seemed to be an intense need to exonerate one’s own group (“us”), as well as justify deep seeded mistrust of “them”. Once it was discovered that foreign born, presumably Muslim, young men had perpetrated the bombing (Perhaps if we add in enough identifiers, each of us can distance ourselves from “them”), I watched on several social network sites, as many people almost gleefully celebrated the exoneration of their group, while armchair quarterbacking appropriate responses and protections.

While it is unknown at this time what exactly triggered the Tsarnaev brothers to commit their act, I can guarantee you at the root of it was division (a classic “us vs. them” conflict). Perhaps they didn’t feel that they fit in to American society, so the entire community composed “them”, perhaps they felt persecuted or marginalized because of their faith or ethnicity, perhaps it was an extension of the Chechnya -Russian conflict. Somewhere, there was an us vs. them mentality at the root. There always is, because regardless of what “group” a terrorist comes from, the us vs. them mentality is the fertile soil that allows the seeds of extremism (darkness) to take root and grow. The division (whether perceived or actual) is necessary for terrorism, because in order to conduct an act of terrorism, you must view your victims as sub-human, or at least deserving of carnage and death, which is not what G*d wants for us, nor is it what human nature dictates. Also, after an act of terrorism, the us vs. them mentality causes friction that prevents true healing.

Zen Moments

This is my twenty-sixth (and final!) post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I have tried to post a point of reflection or insight that I used to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I attempted to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lent itself to interesting insights and growth, because I not only had several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but I also had several days to put any lessons and insights that I discovered to work in my every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I tried to write updates as the weekly topics came up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.

My son Jason and I enjoying an OKC Thunder game!

Z= Zen Moments: Zen moments are moments, often unexpected, of mental and/or spiritual clarity and insight. Zen moments are the times in our life where clarity and insight breaks through the mental and spiritual clouds that can build up during every day life. These moments can happen at any time, but some of my most profound insights and experiences have occurred somewhat out of the blue after I have been ruminating on a seemingly endless topic for quite some time, or when I just take a random moment out of my day to relax, meditate, or reflect.

I have also experienced several of these moments out of the blue with my wife or son, where their laughter, a smile, or a simple hug blissfully places me smack-dab in the here and now, where I cannot help but relish in the beautiful simplicity of the moment. During these moments, the mental clutter and buzz of normal life fades away, and living in the now, is truly blissful.

Some may see moments such as these as a distraction, or even a possible anchor for attachment; because after all, bliss-hunting or bliss-seeking can easily lead one to fall into a never-ending trap of attachment, seeking, depression, and even addiction. However, these moments of clarity, insight, and general bliss, really help to keep me going on my spiritual path. Life isn’t about asceticism, where the one who gives up the most wins the most, the Buddha tried that method and failed miserably. Life should be embraced and enjoyed. Life should be blissful, peaceful, and serene.

Opening Yourself Up To New Experiences

This is my fifteenth post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I will post about a point of reflection or insight that I will use to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I will attempt to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have often found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lends itself to interesting insights and growth, because you not only have several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but you have several days to put any lessons and insights that you discover to work in your every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I will try to write updates as the weekly topics come up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the current and previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.

(c) Shelby Hurst Photography 2010

O= Opening Yourself Up To New Experiences: It is easy and comfortable to get into a routine in our lives. We take the same way to work, we see and talk to the same people every day, watch the same TV shows, read the same genre of literature, order the same items from the same restaurants, etc. While routines aren’t inherently bad, if we aren’t careful our routines can become a rut that cuts us off from the rich experiences that life has to offer.

Our comfortable routines can also prevent us from progressing down our path of personal and spiritual development. I personally have found that situations which have caused me to get out of my comfort zone the most, have actually led to powerful insights and drastic changes in my perceptions. I think that this is the case because just as a stone or wood needs friction to polish it to its true beauty, when we get out of our comfort zone, we can encounter the friction that we need to uncover our true potential, and enjoy life to the fullest.

I have found that the following 7 tips have been especially helpful in getting myself out of my comfort zone in order to experience new facets of life, and open myself up to new experiences:

1) Talk to someone new, or have a meaningful conversation with someone that you may have only interacted with only casually before. You may be surprised at the level of camaraderie and insights that can be obtained from unexpected people, or in relationships that you have never devoted much time to before.

2) Give someone whom you may have an unfavorable opinion of a new chance. I have found that some of my best and most lasting and meaningful friendships have been with people whom I didn’t have a great first impression of.

3) Try reading or watching a news source that is on the other end of your normal political persuasion. By looking at the opposing perspective, you may reveal blind spots in your own ideology and belief system that you never knew existed before. It is also important to view other sides in order to not fall victim to “confirmation bias“, where you merely expose yourself to ideas and viewpoints that already fall in-line with your own, because in essence you will begin to view the world with a pair of blinders on.

Honesty With Ourselves and Others

***Apology: I know that I promised to post these each Monday, but I was vacationing in Hot Springs, Arkansas, over the weekend, and I didn’t have a stable internet connection. I also meant to make this post on Tuesday during my first day back at work, but work found me traveling across the lovely state of Oklahoma, so again no connection to the internet. I have really appreciated the fantastic comments I have been getting with this series, so please bear with me and any technical difficulties! 😉 ***

This is my eighth post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I will post about a point of reflection or insight that I will use to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I will attempt to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have often found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lends itself to interesting insights and growth, because you not only have several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but you have several days to put any lessons and insights that you discover to work in your every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I will try to write updates as the weekly topics come up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the current and previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.

H= Honesty With Ourselves and Others: Honesty is a crucial element of any relationship, including our relationship with ourselves. Externally, honesty is crucial because if we cannot trust the word of another, then trust can never be a part of the relationship, and without trust the relationship will always be full of turmoil. Internally, honesty is a crucial aspect for personal/physical/spiritual development, because in order for any progression to be made, we must be honest with ourselves regarding any internal issues, feelings, or obstacles that may hamper our progression.

Many people laugh when I tell them that I am a stickler for honesty, especially given the fact that I am a practicing attorney. However, I always remind people that my profession is really about finding out the truth of a matter, so that it can be justly and efficiently resolved. Without honesty, I cannot do my job, and the justice system as a whole cannot do its job. I have always made it a cornerstone of my legal practice to be honest with my clients (sometimes brutally so, but it is my job to tell them the truth, not necessarily what they want to hear), as well as in my dealings with opposing counsel. This has worked to my advantage, because I have gained a reputation as a “straight shooter”, because I wont pursue a case unless I actually have a case to pursue. I refuse to lie or fluff in order to build a case. Period. This has allowed me to quickly settle many cases with opposing counsel, based largely on my reputation alone.

In my dealings with my friends, and in my personal relationships with my wife and family, I also try to be as honest as possible, and I expect others to be open and honest with me. This allows my friends, family, and I to avoid many of the turmoils that too many relationships experience. This doesn’t mean that we are perfect, but when issues come up they can be aired in the open, resolved, and then moved on with, rather than burying them beneath the surface to fester.

Rain and the Flow of Life

Photo by: Malene Thyssen

April Rain Song:

Let the rain kiss you.
Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops.
Let the rain sing you a lullaby.
The rain makes still pools on the sidewalk.
The rain makes running pools in the gutter.
The rain plays a little sleep-song on our roof at night –
And I love the rain.

– Langston Hughes (1902-1967).

I have always loved the sound of rain, which is probably why I love spring in Oklahoma, and wistfully wish that I lived someplace like Washington State, where it rains almost all year long. Unfortunately, those of us in Oklahoma have been suffering through the worst drought since the famous “Dust Bowl” period. Luckily, today we have been blessed by several hours of hard steady rain. The rain and occasional thunderclap have added a wonderful soundtrack to my workday, as I finish up some discovery responses in a legal case that I am working on. I have also enjoyed the fresh and clean smell of nature as the various plants outside of my office window open up to receive the rain.

During lunch I replied to a series of emails from a reader asking for advice on how to deal with the spiritual and emotional highs and lows of life. My advice to her was, as I have stated several times on previous posts, is to simply learn to go with the flow of life. I always, half jokingly, tell people to watch “The Big Lebowski“, and try to be more like Jeff Bridges’ character “The Dude”, because no matter the situation, The Dude abides.

Carpe Diem – The Arrival of Fall

My son Jase. (C) 2010- Shelby Hurst Photography – http://shelbyhurstphotography.wordpress.com

The fall (autumn) season is a time of transition, it is a time of change from the hot hectic pace of summer (yard work, vacations, gardening, etc.), to a slower paced time of harvest and relaxation in the cool weather. Fall is one of my favorite times of the year. I live in Oklahoma, so the fall is a wonderful respite from the brutal summer heat, especially this year which was one of the hottest, and driest since the dust bowl. I also love fall for its cool crisp mornings and evenings, and for the spectacular foliage color change.

The other day as I was relaxing on my back porch enjoying a fine cigar and watching the squirrels busily gorge themselves on acorns, as well as hurriedly stash away reserves for the coming winter months. While I was ruminating on the fall season in general, as well as other transitional periods/seasons, my mind kept drifting back to one of my favorite movie scenes of all time, the “Carpe Diem” scene from “The Dead Poets Society”, starring Robin Williams. Please watch the clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQtmGcdSDAI

Carpe Diem is a Latin phrase which translates to “Seize the Day”. As the Character of Robin Williams conveys so well in the scene, today is all we have, so seize today and make the most of it. As most of my readers should know the concept of enjoying life to the fullest, and truly “living” life, is an essential element in my life, as well as in my spiritual path (which is also evidenced by the title for this site).