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Posts Tagged ‘Mindfulness’

Parenting with Mindfulness

August 28, 2013 10 comments

My sweet boys

My sweet boys

A few weeks ago I was up all night with my newborn John. I had an extremely busy day planned, and no matter what i tried, he refused to go to sleep. As the hours ticked away, I could feel myself grow increasingly frustrated. I really wasn’t in the mood for this, I really didn’t have time for this, I really needed sleep so that I could go to work and be productive… Then it hit me. This will pass, and very quickly. Too quickly…

Obviously John wasn’t feeling well, and he was depending on me for comfort and care. While we were apparently getting our signals mixed, he still needed me, and I needed to let go of being frustrated. While I don’t relish sleepless nights with newborns, it seems like just yesterday I was on the alternating night shift routine with my wife, so that we could watch and take care of our oldest son Jase… and Jase started school two weeks ago.

I remember with Jase I couldn’t wait for his next stage of development. I couldn’t wait until he slept all night, I couldn’t wait until he ate solid food, could crawl, walk, be potty-trained, etc. Looking back, most of my anticipation seemed to be driven by more than a dash of selfishness. Once he slept all night, so could I. When he could crawl and then walk, I wouldn’t have to carry him everywhere. Eating solid foods meant I wouldn’t have to constantly prepare and clean bottles. Once potty-trained, I no longer had to check and change diapers every few hours. To say that children grow up too quickly may seem like a cliche, but just looking back over the past 4-1/2 years of Jase’s life, I can tell that it is true.

It is easy to practice mindfulness (the practice of being fully present in each moment), during slow times, meditation, or while conducting a relaxing activity; however, I think that mindfulness is especially important when interacting with our children, no matter how young or old. By being fully present in the moment, we are fully present in life. By being fully present as a parent, we are fully present in our children’s life, which is the most important thing we can do, because only then can we fully interact with our children the way that parents should. Parenting can be tiring and frustrating, but it really is the most important job we have, because our children are mirrors that reflect the lessons and general environment that we provide for them. Our parenting also has a definite impact on the type of adults that our children will grow to be. Will they be impatient, and quick to anger, or will the be kind and understanding? Read more…

Unplugging from Technological Chaos

November 19, 2012 6 comments

This is my twenty-first post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I will post about a point of reflection or insight that I will use to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I will attempt to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have often found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lends itself to interesting insights and growth, because you not only have several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but you have several days to put any lessons and insights that you discover to work in your every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I will try to write updates as the weekly topics come up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the current and previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.

Last sunrise before breaking camp!

U= Unplugging from Technological Chaos: I am often amazed at the amount of general noise that is present in modern life. It seems that almost every moment of my life is filled with electronic noise that seems to be constantly vying for my undivided attention. My iPhone is constantly alive with various buzzes, dings, and chirps (The ringtone of which I have changed to crickets, to make it a bit less raucous), which notifies me of the arrival of emails, Facebook, Twitter, or text messages. Television programs are interrupted every 10 minutes or so with loud and flashy commercials, which all seem to try and convince me that I am either inadequate and am in need of fixing, or that I need to spend more money, and more often than not a combination of the two, all the while seemingly trying to throw me into a light and sound bombardment induced seizure. ūüėČ

Because of the noise saturation and general hectic pace of modern life, the chaos caused therefrom can seem to just be a natural part of modern life. However, there is increasing evidence that the fast paced and noise polluted environment of modern urban and suburban life, is actually damaging to our health. Several studies have shown that noise pollution can cause our stress hormones, and other stress induced physical responses such as heightened blood pressure, to increase dramatically. As the stress responses increase, we can become constantly anxious, nervous, distracted, and even depressed.

In short, the chaos caused by the constant buzz of technology, can cause us to be physically and mentally unhealthy.

I think the extent of noise pollution, and the almost instant relaxation associated with unplugging from the constant buzz, became clearer to me during and after my recent trip to Colorado, where the remoteness of our camp meant very limited cell phone service. At first, the lack of technological connectivity seemed very odd and almost eery. How on earth was I going to manage without being able to constantly keep tab of my social media accounts and my email listservs?!

After a few days of withdrawal, I began to thoroughly enjoy the sense of connectivity with life that is so often hard to achieve with the constant buzz of modern life. Mindfulness was no longer something I had to necessarily strive for, or constantly remind myself to re-engage with, because without technology, my morning coffee and breakfast were enjoyed without interruption, the crunch of snow beneath my feet, and the bite of a cold wind and snow was fully felt, and the smells, sights, and sounds of the mountains were fully experienced. Read more…

Mindful Living

August 20, 2012 5 comments

This is my thirteenth post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I will post about a point of reflection or insight that I will use to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I will attempt to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have often found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lends itself to interesting insights and growth, because you not only have several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but you have several days to put any lessons and insights that you discover to work in your every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I will try to write updates as the weekly topics come up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the current and previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.

Used with permission from Bramstone Photography (c) 2005, via Photopin.com and Flickr Creative Commons. http://www.flickr.com/photos/badboy69/2333409688/

M= Mindful Living: Mindful living (mindfulness) and living in the now really go hand-in-hand, and while many people may view them as being the same, and even use the terms interchangeably (myself included at times) I think there are some important differences. While living in the now, and mindfulness, both involve rooting your thoughts and emotions in the present, mindfulness involves much more focused attention on your physical sensations and emotional states moment-by-moment. For example, if I have a major deadline looming at work, living in the now would involve not allowing that deadline to become a stressor, and instead direct my focus and energy on remaining calm while working diligently on the project in a focused manner (all I can do is what I can do right now, if it can’t be done until tomorrow, then don’t worry about it). Mindfulness takes this a step further by directing your attention to your physical states, sensations, and emotions. Is my breath becoming rapid and shallow, am I starting to feel anxious, do my hands fill cold and clammy, are my head or neck muscles becoming tense?

Mindfulness requires a sort of constantly flowing, moment-by-moment examination of life, it requires you to direct your full attention on this very moment, the right here, right now. This can be difficult, because in today’s fast-paced technological world, we are constantly being bombarded with ringing cellphones, text messages, email alerts, television chatter, etc. This causes us to pay more attention to the external world, than we do on our own thoughts, sensations, and emotions. Mindfulness practice is extremely important, because it forces us to slow down, and keep our emotions and physical responses in check during stressful situations. Mindfulness also, allows us to really drink in and enjoy peaceful, relaxing, and joyous moments. Basically, instead of letting the “monkey mind” bounce our thoughts and emotions around like pinballs in the game of life, mindfulness forces us to slow down and truly “experience” life in all of the wonderful detail available to us. Read more…

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